Russian Jokes

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Vera Inglese
10 dicembre 2016
641
2 minuti
Learning Russian by reading Russian Jokes
When I teach intermediate Russian, there always comes a moment when my students ask me to tell me something about the Soviet Union. The questions range from “What was it like living in the USSR?” to “Is it true that a lot of Russian people miss their soviet past?”

I believe it is high time my students learned some pieces of humour. I offer them a variety of jokes, all written in Russian, helping them not only learn the language but also enjoy our national humour. What can reflect the situation in the country better than humour? What can tell you more about everyday life with its ups and downs?

Humour reveals problems that exist in a society but it does it in a very disguised way. On the other hand, most of Russian jokes are pure sarcasm.

Here is my collection of Soviet jokes that can help those who lean the Russian language have a fun time practicing!

About Soviet planning system:

**— Что в Советском Союзе самое постоянное?
— Временные трудности.**

About economy:

**— Что было раньше – курица или яйцо?
— Раньше всё было.**

About attitude to the government:

**Идут по Красной площади два мужика и один говорит:
— Не пойму, зачем у кремля стены такие высокие.
— Ну как, зачем, - отвечает другой, - чтобы бандиты не перелезли.
— Откуда? Оттуда?**

About total deficit:

**—Скажите, пожалуйста, где это вы туалетную бумагу достали?
— Из химчистки несу.**

About the freedom of speech:

**Советский воробей перелетел на Запад.
— Что, в России плохо с кормом? - спрашивает его западный воробей.
— Нет.
— Так чего же ты там не остался?
— Почирикать захотелось!**

About propaganda:

**Лектор делает доклад об успехах пятилетки:
— В городе "А" построена электростанция...
Реплика из зала:
— Я только что оттуда. Никакой электростанции там нет!
Лектор продолжает:
— В городе "Б" построен химический завод...
Тот же голос:
— Неделю назад я там был, никакого завода там нет!
Лектор:
— А вам, товарищ, нужно поменьше шляться и побольше газеты читать!**

About the cold war:

**Встречаются Брежнев и Картер и рассуждают, в какой стране у народа больше свободы – в США или СССР. Картер говорит:
– У нас в США полная свобода: любой может публично сказать, что президент США – сволочь.
Брежнев ему отвечает:
– Ну и что такого? У нас тоже людей может публично сказать, что президент США – сволочь.**

About politics:

Лектор горкома выступает в психбольнице с лекцией о внутренней и внешней политике партии. Закончил, все бурно аплодируют кроме одного человека в белом халате. Лектор ему:
- А вы, товарищ, что же не аплодируете вместе со всеми?
- А я не сумасшедший. Я медбрат.


Nowadays the Internet is full of modern humour. Unfortunately, a lot of problems from soviet times have not been resolved yet. Well, at least people have not lost their sense of humour and learned to laugh at hard times.



Russo Tutor Vera
$14.00
USD/h

Vera

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(146)
Flag Russo
Russia
288
Russo
Madrelingua
,
Inglese
C2
,
Finlandese
B1
Hello! I will be happy to assist you with Russian. Please, find some information about me below. I have always been passionate about teaching languages and learning about different cultures. I graduated from Moscow State Open Pedagogical University (with a Master’s Degree in teaching the Russian language and literature) in 2005, my additional diploma is ‘Methods of teaching Russian as a foreign language’ (Moscow State University, 2007). In order to improve my performance, I have recently moved to Finland to study at the University of Eastern Finland (based in Joensuu). I am doing a Master’s Degree program in Linguistics which is taught entirely in English and seeks to provide an opportunity to study language, linguistics, language technology and translation from a variety of perspectives. I have worked as a language teacher for more than 10 years. I have worked with people of different cultural backgrounds: American, British, Scottish, Greek, Spanish, Italian, Czech, Polish, Romanian, Serbian, Australian, Ukrainian, Iranian, Peruvian, Japanese, Chinese, Swedish, Finnish, German, French. The companies I have worked with include JPMC, Merck, Pepsi, Shell, BP, Alcoa, GlaxoSmithKline, Alcoa, AT Kearney, Ford, General Motors, AVON, H&M, AGCO, Oshkosh, Microsoft, Nike, General Electric, etc. Being a Russian language teacher, I am responsible for: • determining language schedule, assessing customers’ needs, • preparing a course syllabus for students based on their goals and objectives, • preparing daily lessons and providing instructions on teaching methods and authentic materials use, • assessing learners’ performance and providing monthly reports on students’ progress, • providing feedback to the students including recommendations on how to improve their experience, • consulting other teachers on the choice of learning materials, • providing cultural training on Russian traditions, customs, etiquette, etc. When I teach, I always concentrate on all components of the language: listening, speaking, writing, reading, pronunciation, vocabulary building and grammar practice. I will be happy to develop a special program for you to support your Russian studies and make them fun and productive at the same time.
$14.00
USD/h
Flag Russo
Russia
288
Russo
Madrelingua
,
Inglese
C2
,
Finlandese
B1
Hello! I will be happy to assist you with Russian. Please, find some information about me below. I have always been passionate about teaching languages and learning about different cultures. I graduated from Moscow State Open Pedagogical University (with a Master’s Degree in teaching the Russian language and literature) in 2005, my additional diploma is ‘Methods of teaching Russian as a foreign language’ (Moscow State University, 2007). In order to improve my performance, I have recently moved to Finland to study at the University of Eastern Finland (based in Joensuu). I am doing a Master’s Degree program in Linguistics which is taught entirely in English and seeks to provide an opportunity to study language, linguistics, language technology and translation from a variety of perspectives. I have worked as a language teacher for more than 10 years. I have worked with people of different cultural backgrounds: American, British, Scottish, Greek, Spanish, Italian, Czech, Polish, Romanian, Serbian, Australian, Ukrainian, Iranian, Peruvian, Japanese, Chinese, Swedish, Finnish, German, French. The companies I have worked with include JPMC, Merck, Pepsi, Shell, BP, Alcoa, GlaxoSmithKline, Alcoa, AT Kearney, Ford, General Motors, AVON, H&M, AGCO, Oshkosh, Microsoft, Nike, General Electric, etc. Being a Russian language teacher, I am responsible for: • determining language schedule, assessing customers’ needs, • preparing a course syllabus for students based on their goals and objectives, • preparing daily lessons and providing instructions on teaching methods and authentic materials use, • assessing learners’ performance and providing monthly reports on students’ progress, • providing feedback to the students including recommendations on how to improve their experience, • consulting other teachers on the choice of learning materials, • providing cultural training on Russian traditions, customs, etiquette, etc. When I teach, I always concentrate on all components of the language: listening, speaking, writing, reading, pronunciation, vocabulary building and grammar practice. I will be happy to develop a special program for you to support your Russian studies and make them fun and productive at the same time.

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